Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Can't stop thinking about it!

I felt the need to post an entry here. Not because I am going to be working on the car, after all, but because it is that time of year when it's all in my face. There are classic car shows everywhere, and even if you don't go, you see them on the roads. (This is not me complaining about the's me being sad.)

The 'project' got as far as us getting the car covered and then, once the ice melted, getting all the pine needles and sticks that had frozen to the car's windshield and roof. Then, as soon as things were falling into place -great work schedule for afternoon grease fests, warm weather approaching, everyone getting along- things took a terrible turn. It's all in my last entry, it's just so upsetting!

So you'd think I'd just delete the car blog and facebook page and get on with my life. Well, I did get on with my life, sort of. I've been making dresses. In actual fact, I've been TRYING to make dresses to feel like I am doing something productive with my days. The dresses are poorly constructed out of old sheets, but they definitely have kept my mind off the car.
That is, of course, until I am driving home and pass some beautiful old Charger or Mustang and want to go shake my father and ask why he insists on pissing everyone off all the time!
I couldn't resist the urge to give a big 'thumbs up' to a guy in his classic muscle car as I drove by him in my 2000 Cavalier. He waved, but likely thought, 'hey, crazy. Nice car'.
I know absolute jack about cars. I am so terrible at driving a standard that I used to need a half hour to work out the adrenaline overload from the stress of driving my dad's car years ago. But, my dad's love of cars, his history of drag racing, and this one glimmering hope of actually being able to learn something gave me a feeling of belonging to this unique group of people who don't merely appreciate cars, but know WHY they appreciate them. Sure, you can love something based on looks alone, but it's a much deeper connection when you know what's going on inside...when you connect with it's 'soul'.

So I was about to delete all my barracuda stuff when I thought, maybe there's still a chance? I reached out to dad to try to bridge the gap between him and my sister. They spoke, but they are not 'speaking'. I kept the lines open with the hope that we could get this going again. I even toyed with the idea of just doing it myself. I mean, not by MYSELF, but probably with out Steph. I considered trying to convince my dad to let me have the car towed to my house, but knew he'd never go for it. I just didn't know it's future, with my dad talking about selling the house and moving 'in 2 years'.
But then I got more bad news when I called to check in on brother had moved back in. I guess it's good for dad to have someone there, but two guys who can not take care of themselves really shouldn't be relying on each other. But that's just my opinion. I have not seen my brother in several years, and it doesn't bother me. I don't really want to run into him again, simply based on the fact that his life is filled with drama that I just don't need to be involved in.
Okay...wait...I'm getting off subject here...
The point is: I will not be going to my dad's house for any reason, any time soon.
So that's it. I believe any hope of getting this project back in motion has been shot to hell. I know that if I wanted to go ahead, I would be dealing with my brother and it was already going to be hard enough dealing with my dad. I would not get to do anything and it would not be fun.
Maybe brother will finish what he started when he put the new engine in?
Maybe uncle will come out for a visit to help with the car and then take it back?
Maybe dad will be able to find someone who wants to deal with the hassle of getting the car out of the yard (since it is trapped by the wheelchair ramp that was built right behind it) and get rid of it?
Maybe, probably, he'll try to sell it for an outrageous amount of money, no one will buy it, and it will sit in the yard and rot away as I have seen happen many times throughout my childhood?

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